I have been really struggling with frustration and depression for the past year, okay, maybe the last two years, but I’ve recently had some breakthroughs!
Let me pass on some stuff I've learned.
1. It is not necessary to understand the cause of the problem to solve it.
Most people believe that it’s essential to know the roots of the problem before they can change. ‘If only I knew why I’m so…I’d be able to change myself’. Unfortunately, this isn’t true. A belief like this often fosters the ‘paralysis of analysis’, encouraging too much navel gazing that makes people do the exact opposite of moving forward.2. Spend only 20% of your time on what’s wrong, and 80% on what’s right.
If you spend 80% of your time focusing on the problem and only 20% on the solution what do you think is going to happen? It’s easy to complain. It’s easy to be a defeatist. You need to make it so it’s even easier to answer the question ‘so what are you doing about it?’3. No matter what else is happening, you are at least doing one thing right in your life.
No matter how badly you think your life may be going, or how messed up you think you are, there is at least one thing you are doing right in your life or you wouldn’t be alive reading this, so thanks for coming here. At least someone is reading this blog!4. Your problems aren’t always there!
You may think you’re always depressed, or sad, or down and out…only because you haven’t noticed when you haven’t been. You know when you are…how about when you aren’t? For example, it’s physically impossible to be depressed all the time…notice that next time you really really really need to go to the toilet. If it’s not possible to be depressed all the time, then it’s also not possible not to be happy all the time.5. You are more than just your problems.
You are not a depressive. You are not a retrenched worker. You are not a rejected salesman. You are not last place. Let’s not lie, you are responsible for the results you create in your life, sure. But you are not your problems. You are a living breathing human being who is infinitely more complex than even all of your problems added up together.6. If what you are doing isn’t working, do something, anything, different from what you’ve been doing before!
If you find yourself stuck in a rut, you’re stuck because you’re doing the same things over and over again in that same spot. If you really need a change, just challenge yourself to do one thing differently from before. A little shift already creates a different result, and little shifts build on to create bigger shifts in time.7. Today is a new day.
The past does not equal the future. The future can be better than the past, unless you make it worse. You can focus on what’s over and unchangeable and miss making it better here and now, ---or you can do better! Leave the past where it belongs. Create hope for the future. Think of some ways you can begin doing that, even if they are small ways!8. See what you want in the future.
Not what you don’t want. What you do want. Since the future’s a blank canvas, you’re free everyday to paint it as you wish. You can choose to paint a bleak picture…but is that a quality choice? If you can see, hear or feel it, you can go to it. Do this as often and as much as you can.9. What are you grateful for in your life right now?
The most spiritual and uplifting quality I know of is living the attitude of gratitude. No matter who or where you are, the fact that you’re still here, means that you have at least one thing you can be grateful for in your life right now. By recognizing that there are good things in your life, will you attract even more good things!10. Nothing worthwhile ever comes without some sacrifice.
There are many things that work to keep us from completing our life-missions. Over the years, I’ve debated whether the worst enemy is procrastination or discouragement. When we’re discouraged, we become ineffective. When we’re discouraged, we work against our own faith. If you’re discouraged, don’t give up without a fight. Nothing worthwhile ever happens without endurance and energy.
Are you feeling frustrated? Has this helped at all? What are some of the ways you overcome frustration in your life?
