How Open Minded Are You?

If you shut yourself off from learning something new because you have a biased view of something old, you will never be able to expand your understanding. 


This includes the way you read the Bible. But when looking at Bible scriptures, sometimes you will encounter passages that seem to contradict something else you learned or understood. What seem to be contradictions or hard places can be opportunities for you to gain a greater understanding of what the whole of the Bible is saying.

Usually, when something you read seems to contradict another passage of scripture, it is because your knowledge of the whole of the scriptures is limited, and therefore so is your view. Think of it this way: It would be difficult to write a report on the cultures of the world if all you know is what you have seen in U.S. You may have some insight into other cultures, but it would take an intense study of other cultures, preferably in foreign countries, to get the most accurate report. If you are only familiar with certain portions and concepts of the Bible, your understanding of how it all fits together will be limited. This is why you have to have an open mind when studying - you may find that there are some huge pieces missing to the puzzle as you currently know it.

Another problem with contradictions are because the original languages of the Bible are Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek. If one wishes to be a careful student of the Scriptures, some research concerning the biblical languages is important. Sometimes our English translations may not be accurate when it comes to certain words.

A treasured study tool for Bible research is the Strong's Concordance. It has a topical index, Hebrew and Greek Lexicons, and you can even search for Bible verses by the individual words in them. Find every Bible verse containing the word "compassion" or any other word, just like searching a dictionary! You might be surprised at what you find when you look at a literal translation. Young’s Literal Translation is also available online too.

So...the next time you read a Bible verse, especially a controversial one, take some extra time and do a little research. If you have an open mind, you might gain a greater understanding.


Have you ever changed your mind about something you read in the Bible ?

Growing Spiritually

You are a spirit with a physical body, not a physical body with a spirit. If you can accept this idea, it will change your attitude toward many things in your life. Here are a few tips I’ve taken to help with the process of spiritual growth and it’s still an ongoing journey for me!

Embrace Your Gifts and Talents

Recognize and further develop your intelligence and special gifts. Our talents are signifiers that lead us toward our unique paths. Follow your passion and you will soon discover where you fit in this world. When we squelch innate yearnings we lose our way.

Tie Up Loose Ends

Unresolved issues eat away at us emotionally and mentally. Tackle troubling things that need dealt with and put them to rest. In the meanwhile, learn not to allow future problems to be ignored. Our wounds fester when they are not attended to in a timely manner. Realize that buried problems always surface eventually. Dealing with difficulties as they arise rather than hiding from them is the best route.

Be Responsible in Relationships

Turn away from the "blame game" when it comes to addressing problems in your relationships. Be honest about the things that you have said or done that harmed the relationship. Own up to your own failures. Focus on changing your defeating patterns rather than expecting changes from the other person.

Let Go of Useless Attachments

If a thing no longer serves a purpose in your life, it is clutter. Clutter can be a physical thing or a belief that blocks your path. Holding on to things that don't feed you will instead eat up your energy. Free your space and expand your energy by getting rid of unwanted gifts, broken or useless items, self-defeating mental images, etc.

Confront Your Past Goofs

Everyone makes mistakes or regrets past decisions. Exposing our frailties and recognizing that we are not perfect frees us from feeling stupid or "less than." Bring light to those things that you are not proud of and realize that through these experiences you have learned great lessons, and have likely become a better person for them. Keeping negative actions hidden can overshadow our spirits with shame or depression. We all deserve to live with joy regardless of our imperfections.

Go with the Flow

This can be difficult for me. There is a fine line between caution and fear. We are meant to travel along a spiritual pathway. We are not meant to remain stunted in one place for very long. Yes, change can be scary. But, change is a path of learning, so why not follow it? When we resist change we can actually create chaos. Do you want to undertake a lesson down a path which you've chosen, or have lessons thrown at you down a path that was forced upon you?

Accept Delays

Another one I have a hard time dealing with! There are times when we need to be still. Impatience or frustration will not help any situation. Desired changes sometime take time to unfold. You may feel like you are ready to jump into a new arena... but wait. The situation or person that you are wanting to meet may not be ready for you just yet. It's okay to sit at the bus stop for a few more minutes, the bus will arrive eventually.


So what about you? Are there some things you could add to this?

I'm Stressed Out!

  Click here to see Phil's Video

Was Jesus a Kill-Joy?

Phil discusses a powerful misconception on video, click here if you cannot see the video.

The Power Of Generosity

A while back my family and I experienced some very difficult times. We were having health and financial problems that were beyond our control. We received some help, not from a church or institution, but from a few generous people who stepped in. Because of those caring people, I’m a better person today. I’m a more generous individual.

I think people whose lifestyles are marked by generosity become miraculous forces for good in the world, inviting God’s love to flow through them and into the lives of other people to change them for the better. You can become one of those people!

Here are five steps I am developing to become a more generous person:

Let gratitude lead to generosity. Make an inventory list of your blessings, taking a few minutes to write down everything you can think of for which you’re grateful (from your friends and family members to the food you eat and the air you breathe). Then study the list to realize how much you have. In gratitude, let your response be generous giving.

Decide to serve a cause that’s greater than your own life: making the world a better place. Reach out to other people -- rather than resenting the time, energy, money, and inconveniences that can be involved. I would just start with one person or maybe one family. Keep it simple.

Help other people regardless of your current circumstances. If you don’t have much money, you could give some of your time. If you possess a special talent, consider how to use it to contribute to others. There is always make a way for you and I to give.

Incorporate service into your lifestyle. Look for opportunities  to help meet needs every day. Be creative about ways to fit more service into your life, such as by transforming some of your daily activities into acts of service or using money you would have spent to buy something for yourself to buy a gift for someone else instead.

Look beyond just those you love. Don’t limit your generosity only to the people you know and love. Also be willing to reach out to strangers, people who make you uncomfortable, and those who can’t reciprocate. Challenge yourself to remember that, if you believe God has made every human being on the planet in his image , you need to reach out to all the people you encounter with his love. When you do, miracles may happen in the lives of the people you help, and in your own life, as well.

This is still a work in progress in my life but I’m seeing cool things happen.
Do you have any creative ideas on how to be a more generous person? 

The Power Of Compassion

Having compassion can radically change your life. Are you a compassionate person? One definition of compassion is the ability to understand the emotional state of another person or oneself. 

Compassion has the added element of having a desire to alleviate or reduce the suffering of another.

I believe that having compassion for someone involves more than putting yourself in their place and genuinely wanting to understand or even help them. It involves beginning to have a totally different perspective when it comes to how you perceive others. For example, instead of assuming that the reason someone has done something that hurts you is because they are selfish or inconsiderate, assume instead that they had a good reason for doing it.

This can be difficult to buy into at first. But when you think about it, don't you usually have a good reason when you do something, even if what you did may seem inconsiderate to someone else?

Let's say you are very worried about your child's health. You took him to the doctor and he decided to take tests in order to rule out a serious disease. Later that day you are walking down the street, preoccupied with your son and an acquaintance passes you and says hello. You say hello in return but because you are so deep in thought you don't stop to chat. Later on you hear the acquaintance felt insulted because you "snubbed" him.

Even though it was not your intention to snub this person, and you had a very good reason for your behavior-the acquaintance assumed the worst. Unfortunately, this is what most of us do. We assume the worst.

Learning to have more compassion involves making the radical shift to assume the best in others. If the acquaintance had assumed the best, he would have concluded that it wasn't personal-that you must have been preoccupied-and he would have been right.

To be honest, it frustrates me that many evangelical groups don't seem to have much compassion for the down and out in our society. I used to struggle with having compassion for others but that has started to change over the last few years, due to my own personal struggles. I now believe that at every level of society, the key to a happier and more successful world is the growth of compassion.  From my own limited experience I have found that the greatest degree of inner peace comes from the development of love and compassion.

When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things. Mark 6:34

Whom do you need to show compassion on today?

Sex? Did Someone Say...Sex?

“Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.” Song of Songs 4:16

The above scripture is from a book in the Bible. For centuries, pastors used to preach and write about the book, Song of Songs, as a poetic commentary on Christ’s endearing love for His Bride, the Church. They did that because they wanted to avoid the obvious: that the Song of Songs is actually about sex education and the intimate love between two dedicated partners.

If you take some time to read the entire book, it seems to me me that it is stating something that is obvious: loving sex is good for your relationship. The poetic images that are used throughout this short book are about two people who woo each other lovingly, gently, and faithfully. It was written as a guidance book about intimacy between a man and a woman.

I bring this up, not to further frustrate the single person, but to encourage the married person, have sex and lots of it! Sex a gift and enjoy the gift! 

This weekend at Alive Church we begin a series called, Pure Sex. Check it out online.
So...here are some tips to help make love-making more exciting:

• Find new places to do it.
• Find new ways to do it.
• Find other ways to pleasure one another besides the old faithful. (The "old faithful" is the normal thing ... change it up)
• Buy a Kama-sutra book - read and follow instructions!
• If you have kids in the home - then take advantage of any time they are gone or outside playing. (You can clean the house later ... just lock the doors)
• See how many times a day you can do it!
• See how many times in one night you can do it!
• Spend an hour just touching and kissing.
• Play Doctor.

Any thing you’d like to add to this?

You Really Can Do It Yourself

This week at Alive Church we will be talking about the Bible. It’s important to read the scriptures for yourself and not just relay on other people’s interpretation. When you do it yourself, you may be surprised.


Many people sincerely want to study their Bibles on their own, but they just don’t know how. Where should you start? Is there more than one way to study the Bible? What is the best method for you to use?

I don’t think there is only one way to read it, in fact, here are 12 methods to consider. Figure out which one is good for you.

1. The Devotional Method
This method sets the foundation for all of the others. If application is the ultimate goal of how we’re to interact with the Bible, then this method may be the most important for our spiritual lives. It involves taking a passage of Scripture and prayerfully meditating on it until you find a concrete application.

2. The Chapter Summary Method
This may be the easiest of the Bible study methods to use, and you need very few extra biblical resources to do it effectively. Using the method, you’ll get a general overview of a chapter. You can use the method to systematically go through it or you can pick various chapters that are of interest to you.

3. The Character Quality Method
We’ve all got areas of our lives that need work. Using this Bible study method, you can work on positive character qualities that you need to improve (such as honesty, humility, and diligence) and negative ones you need to avoid (such as pride and greed). Unless you really understand a character quality, you’ll never be able to develop it in your life. Through this method you’ll focus on one character quality, look at how biblical characters lived it out, and look for ways to build the character trait into your own life (or avoid it).

4. The Thematic Method
This study method involves taking a biblical theme (like interceding for others or “the hand of the Lord”) and asking no more than five predetermined questions of the relevant biblical texts. This is another Bible study method that requires few reference tools, with a Bible and a concordance being the most important ones. It’s a great method to use when you’re preparing a Bible study or mentoring someone. It’s also a nice first step before digging into a more thorough topical study.

5. The Biographical Method
This one is pretty self-explanatory. It involves picking a biblical character and studying his or her life as presented by Scripture. But it isn’t just about storing information on the person. The reason you study biblical characters is to see why they were spiritual successes or failures. Once you discover that, you can either emulate what made them spiritually successful or avoid what made them fail. With more than 3000 biblical characters, this form of Bible study offers an almost endless supply of opportunities.

6. The Topical Method
In many ways this is like the thematic study, only more extensive. When studying the Bible topically, you typically attack a broad subject in Scripture (or in a specific book of the Bible)—like prayer or sin. Also, unlike a thematic study, you ask every question you can muster. What you get at the end is a broad idea of what the Bible (or a book in the Bible) says about the topic.

7. The Word Study Method
Many of the great doctrines of Scripture revolve around a single word, such as grace, atonement, or faith. This study method allows you to focus on what some of these words mean in the original language. The method requires more reference books than the other studies, because you’ll need sources to be able to uncover the meaning of the biblical words in the original languages. The method is based on two things. First, the meaning you find from a word must be based on the original languages. Second, context must give you the ultimate meaning of the word you’re studying, not the English translation.

8. The Book Background Method
This method helps you get a good feel for the background of the biblical passage or book you are studying. You do it by focusing on understanding the history, culture, geography, and political events surrounding the passage. Of course, this method is highly dependent upon collecting quality Bible study reference tools.

10. The Book Survey Method
In the book survey method, you get a telescopic view of a book of the Bible. By doing this step first, you understand how the pieces of the book fit together. It helps you ensure that you won’t mistake the forest for the trees when you study the book further through the next few methods.

11. The Chapter Analysis Method
Next, you focus your study on a particular chapter from the book you just surveyed. Through this method you’ll look carefully at each paragraph, sentence, and word in the passage you are studying. As you study the chapters of the Bible in this way, you’ll limit outside help and ensure that you’re getting your own insights on Scripture.

12. The Verse-by-Verse Method
You take a particular verse of Scripture and study it in detail by asking particular questions, looking at cross-references and paraphrasing each verse. You can either use this study to work systematically through a passage or combine it with the topical method to look at all of the Scripture related to a topic.

The most important thing is to start reading, just do it. I would suggest daily.  Pick a specific time and stick with it.

Is there a particular method you like? Let us hear your thoughts!

10 Things in 12

I can be a very driven person. It’s easy for me to get caught up in a drive to be successful in this life. But what really is success? I’ve put together a short list for 2012 to help keep me on track. Let me know if it helps you.

10 Things to Remember in 12.

1. Life is a marathon, not a 50-yard dash. It’s not how you start that matters. It’s how you finish the race. Sustainability counts more than speed. Don’t give up! Run the race for a “heavenly reward that never disappears” (1 Cor. 9:25)..

2. Every person matters.. There is no such thing as an insignificant person. Jesus died all people and if he favors anyone, it’s the poor and downtrodden. Don’t look down on anyone, in fact, make plans this years to help more of those less fortunate than you.

3. Take time for yourself.  If you are feeling like life is out of control, that you are undervalued, that you are too busy, or if you put the needs of others consistently before your own, then it is time to create some time and space for yourself. Taking time for yourself allows you to renew, heal, and create reserves of energy and peace. Honoring yourself enables you to discover your truth, access your creativity and experience a sense of peace, wholeness, purpose, and balance.

4. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else.  It is foolish to compare. Why? First, you can always find someone doing a better job than you and you’ll get discouraged. Second, you can always find someone you’re doing a better job than, and you’ll become prideful. Either one can sabotage your life and calling. . When you get to heaven, God won’t say, “Why weren’t you more like ….? He made you to be you not someone else.

5. Live for an audience of One. The moment you start worrying about what other people think, your life is handicapped. If criticism is true, listen and learn from it. If it is false, ignore it and forget it. Remember that God is the ultimate judge of your life and calling. Maintain a tough skin and tender heart.

6. Never criticize nor envy others. . I’ve seen more people defeated by these two traps than anything else. A critical or an envious spirit quenches joy. We are to “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12:15).

7. Be humble or you’ll stumble. He who gets too big for his britches will inevitably be exposed in the end! Whenever I am prideful I become the enemy of God because “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble people are teachable and don’t rush to judge others. Humility is being honest about your weaknesses. Humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less! It’s not about you or me!

8. Learn from everyone. Work smarter, not harder. Every time I hear about anyone making an impact, I say, “Cool! Now teach me how to do it too!” All leaders are learners. The moment you stop learning, you stop leading. You can learn from anyone if you ask the right questions.

9. Personal growth is seasonal. Every living thing goes through seasons of growth (spring and summer) and dormancy (fall and winter). We all go through these seasons. Healthy personal growth takes TIME. A mushroom, takes 6 hours to form. An oak tree takes 60 years. Do you want to be a mushroom or an oak tree? You may feel like your life is dormant right now, that’s okay, just keep doing the right things. Keep on believing, learning, loving, and putting down roots. Spring and summer are coming! Hang on!

10. Never confuse prominence with significance. Yes, my nose is prominent, (insert your own joke about me here),  but I could lose it and still live. On the other hand, my lungs and liver will never been seen but they are far more significant. I’d die without them. You may have big dreams but you may be living in a small town or in circumstances with limited growth potential. So what? Reach out and help the people you are around. You are there for a reason, no matter how insignificant you think it is.

Which one of these points speaks to you?

Happy New Year!

Does God Want You To Have Fun?

Happy Thanksgiving! Unfortunately many times the Holidays bring stress. You may be under a lot of stress right now because of the time of year or the economy, or maybe something else, but God still wants you to enjoy life.

He doesn't want you to live without fun. The apostle Matthew spent three years with Jesus and he wrote, "[Jesus] came, enjoying life" (Matthew 11:19 PH).

Many people don't have fun in life because they are trying to live up to someone else's expectations. You and I can have fun in life because we are secure within God's love. God loves you just as you are! He accepts you as you are! Be yourself and enjoy what you have in this life.

Unfortunately, there are many people who do not want to let God into their lives because they fear God will make them give up anything that is fun. In other words, they think that to become a believer is the same as saying the party's over, that to be spiritual is to be miserable.

People are frantically looking for fun fixes, but that means they operate under the law of diminishing returns. They spend more time, more money, and more energy to get less and less of a thrill. They go around asking, "Are we having fun yet?"

The scripture says God "richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment" (1 Timothy 6:17b NIV). God wants you and I to enjoy life!

Even if things may be a little stressful right now, kick off your shoes and remember to take some time out this season to appreciate the people in your life and have fun.

Will You Take The Risk?

Three years ago I was a broken person. I felt like most people didn’t care about me or my family, I felt like people had betrayed me, I even wondered about God himself! Things were not working out according to my plan and purpose. I became bitter and resentful.

Over the last three years I have slowly come around to reconciling those issues. Things are definitely so much better now and I'll probably blog about how and why that change to place in a future post. 

One of the keys to my change of attitude  has been remembering this parable:

Jesus once told the story of a master who gave three servants each a sum of money to handle while he was away. When he returned, the first servant told the master he’d doubled the money through investments, and the second said he’d made fifty percent profit for the master.

But the third servant, in essence, said he’d been afraid the master would punish him for making mistakes, so he hid the money in the cellar until the master returned. The master rewarded the first two servants, saying those who handle small matters well will be given greater responsibility. But he rebuked the third servant, saying, “Risk your life and get more than you ever dreamed of. Play it safe and end up holding the bag” (Luke 19:26 MSG).

In order to live a life of faith, we must take risks. Not just any kind of risks, but ones that are specifically directed by God. These God-nudges push us beyond the border of our “State of Independence,” where we live by sight, into the “State of Grace,” where we live by faith.

When we do not live by faith, we live faithlessly. Any decision independent of God is a faithless decision. Jesus calls you to risk your life for God, but he also guarantees that God will always be waiting for you on the other side of each and every step of faith you take.

God is for you. He says, “Risk your life and get more than you ever dreamed of.”

Don’t get me wrong, i’m not saying every risk you take is going to end up in success and happiness according to your standards. However I do feel you will be better off in the long run because you stepped out of your comfort zone!

So...What risk should you take today?

Excuse Me, Can I Provoke You?

I’ve been know to provoke some people with my stupid humor. (Sorry).
Unfortunately many people seem to think it’s their mission to provoke others who don’t believe exactly like they do, whether it be in the area of politics or theology. 
But i want to talk about a different kind of provoking.

There’s a scripture in Hebrews 10: 24 that reads, “Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good works...”

To provoke one another to love - We use the word "provoke" now in a somewhat different sense, as meaning to offend, to irritate, to incense; but its original meaning is to "arouse, to excite, to call into action," and it is used in this sense here.

The Greek is, literally, "unto a paroxysm of love" - εἰς παροξυσμον eis paroxusmon - the word "paroxysm" meaning "excitement or impulse," and the idea is, that they were to endeavor to arouse or excite each other to the manifestation of love. The word is what properly expresses excitement, and means that believers should endeavor to excite each other, not put each other down! Still with me?

So...with that in mind, who are you going to provoke today?

This weekend at Alive Church we begin a new series called SNL, (Salt N Light). This is all about choosing to make a positive difference in the lives around us. You can provoke someone in a negative sense or you can do it in a positive way. The way of love!

For more information or to catch up on past talks, just go to AliveChurch.com.

Serving and Spiritual Gifts

Check out Chazown.com

Easter, What it's Not About

This Easter weekend most of the sermons preached in churches will recount the story of how Jesus died a brutal death for you and me and then after three days he rose from the dead. His resurrection from the dead means you have eternal life.

But wait, could there be more? What could be more than eternal life you ask? It’s means more than your own personal fire insurance! 

Back up the tape for a moment and ask yourself these questions regarding the Friday before the resurrection of Christ took place.

• What did the death of Jesus on Friday mean to the blind man who regained his sight after the Healer's touch? 
• What did it mean to the woman who had been restored to her place in society after being rendered unclean for twelve years by her unstoppable flow of blood? 
• What did the crucifixion mean to the leper who, undoubtedly desperate for human contact, received that and more during a chance encounter with Jesus? 
• How about little Talitha's family, or Lazarus' family?
• How about the Centurion may have felt to hear that Jesus had died on the cross that day?

Why was it that the religious leaders and political authorities so desperately wanted to kill Jesus? Each lash of the whip, each nail, and every insult hurled at him while He hung on the cross was a simultaneous assault on a generation of people who had finally started to feel loved… and free… and hopeful.  Jesus’ death seemed like another major disappointment for those with no hope. Crushed again.

But Easter Sunday is the subversion of a system that had been stacked against "the least of these." Jesus alive means hope alive! That's the Good News.

Those who proclaimed that Jesus had risen were telling the powerful that despite their attempts to bury hope and equality... despite their efforts to kill the voice of the one who had touched them when no one else would... despite their efforts to entomb the Good News that was being preached to the poor and the radical message of liberty for the captives, the hope of the people would continue to live. They live because Jesus lives.

Easter Sunday means that hope is still brewing, even in the most corrupt systems. The resurrection means that love is still powerful in ways that can often only be explained by invoking the transcendent. Easter means that nothing can stop the will of a downtrodden people who feel driven by a force greater than themselves-- Not the death of one person. Not the death of a religious ideology. Not even the death of a generation.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m very glad that I can experience eternal life but Easter Sunday is not about my personal happiness. Celebrate the Good News of Jesus Christ because of what it means to the sick, the outcast, the hungry and the voiceless.

I believe the scripture Jesus quoted now applies to us, The Spirit of the Lord is upon us, for he has anointed us to bring Good News to the poor. He has sent us to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free, and that the time of the Lord’s favor has come. (Luke 4:18-19)

Because it’s not about you or me. It’s about God’s love for “the least of these.”

Enjoy Your Journey

It’s so easy for me to get so goal driven that I fail to enjoy my life.  I find that I’m not the only person who struggles with this. 

Many good people get so bogged down with the challenges of this world that they do not feel the freedom to enjoy the journey we call life. It also affects the other folks in your life in a negative way!

Because of that we try to change our situation. We change our relationship or our job or our school or even the way we look. Perhaps there are times when some of those changes may be necessary but...

True freedom doesn’t come in the future, from a situation, or “from” anything at all, but is available to us now!

Some things to consider if you and I really want freedom to enjoy the journey.

Don’t take it personally.
Nothing anybody says or does to you has anything to do with you. Each person’s opinion is solely the product of their own life and reality. It’s hard to imagine this. It’s way easier to get offended, mad, or pissed off or to internalize and believe what they said. Rather than getting consumed by it, obsessed over it and letting it affect you, just let it go. Hear what they say, accept that it is a reflection of their world and poof. Move on.

This is also true when someone is giving you advice. Have you ever shared your biggest dream? The responses can be all over the map. One person may say, “Good luck with that, maybe you should come back to earth” while another may be all about it, “YES! Go for it!”

Does that mean the first person doesn’t believe in you? Absolutely not. It means they may not believe in themselves.  In other words, it is hard for that person to imagine your dream in his own realm of possibility.

When someone says something to you, whether it be an insult, piece of advice, or anything at all, ---only you can know what is true or not. By taking another person’s opinion of yourself to heart and choosing to believe it, you could be doing yourself a huge injustice.

Don’t be a victim.
It’s easy to think that the world is against you. Have you ever had one of those days where everything goes wrong? It happens to me often.  There are things in our control and out of our control. You can’t control the world around you, but you can control how you react to things. Don’t fall into the downward spiral of the victim trap.

Embrace each and every thing that happens as an opportunity.
Often we need to slow down, and come back to the present before life zips by.

Accept situations as opportunities, and remember that there is a purpose and a greater good to each. Look for the lesson rather than getting stuck in victim mode.

Be gentle, kind, and compassionate with yourself.
You thought I was going to say to others, right?
We should be kind to others but we also need to have an awareness behind our thoughts, and acknowledge what we say about ourselves. Are your thoughts kind? Or are you your own worst critic? When you look in the mirror, do you see beauty or do you pick yourself apart?

Imagine having a little person on your shoulder telling you horrible things about yourself all day long. Sounds awful, doesn’t it? How do you think that would affect your life? Well, that is what we’re doing to ourselves if we stay in a place of constant negative self talk.

Work on shifting your thoughts to ones that are more loving and kind. Every time you think something negative about yourself, replace it with a positive. Eventually you will start believing them. Doing so allows you to have the freedom to just be you.  For as he thinks within himself, so he is. Proverbs 23:7 NAS

Practice the F word
The powerful F word. Forgiveness isn’t about saying that whatever happened was okay, right, or just, but about letting it go. Forgiving is releasing the power that a certain event has on you. By not forgiving you are keeping your mind in the past, thinking and wishing that things could have been different. This traps you and makes you feel powerless.

Forgiveness puts you back into the present—the only time that truly exists—where you have the power to live free and happy.

What do your thoughts look like? Allow your mind’s grip to release so freedom and joy can flow in.
Get free you you can enjoy your journey!

It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that's how freedom grows.
Galations 5:13 The Message